Y’all want to know what really irritates me to my soul? What just really grinds the fuck out of my gears??
When you try helping someone because they’re having a rough patch in life, but then they take advantage of that and start to expect you to always be there to help them whenever they need it.
But when the tables are turned and you need help, or if you tell them you can’t help them, then they all of a sudden disappear. Like they’re your friend and always around to hang out as long as you are helping them, but when you can’t help them (or won’t anymore) all of a sudden they don’t know who you are and you don’t see or hear from them.
Like seriously, can it be anymore obvious that you’re just using friendship as a tool or game to get whatever you need or want!?
Either actually be a friend and value the friendship you’re given or just go fail on your own. I fucking can’t stand people who abuse the fact that you’re a nice person and like to help others.
So most of y’all know, just like almost everyone else in the world, I’m all over social media. From Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, all the way down to Snapchat, Youtube, Tiktok, and Clapper.
One thing I’ve been noticing A LOT of is how many women talk about “it’s not right to put other women [or other people in general] down for any reason”. There’s so many women that leave comments to other people that say [something along the lines of] “you shouldn’t judge other people for how they live their lives, we all do things differently, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong.”
But you know what really gets me about that??
Those same women that tell people not to judge others and that it’s so wrong to put other women [or people] down, will comment some of the most degrading and rudest shit under other people’s videos…
Someone help me make it make sense!!
Either you’re ok with putting other people down OR you think it’s wrong and people shouldn’t do…but you CAN NOT play both sides of that field.
You can’t think it’s wrong to put some people down, but be ok with putting others down. That’s not how it works at all!!
**Thanks guys, sorry I just really needed to get that off my chest.**
It’s been a depressing last few days for me. I just haven’t been feeling like my normal perky self for about a week or two. I’m not really sure what’s been going on, but I’m definitely trying to pull myself out of it.
Andy’s been doing his best to try and be understanding and super helpful with pulling me out of this “funk” I’ve been in. But honestly, he can only do so much when I can’t really explain what’s wrong with me other than feeling a little depressed.
I’ve been working a lot lately, spiritually, to try and better understand myself and I think coming into who I really am is causing a little depression just because my mind doesn’t work well with change and it’s scary because I honestly thought I knew who I was and now I’m discovering this whole new side of me…it’s scary.
Some of you have been emailing me and sending me DMs on our social media pages wondering where I’ve been and how come my posts are so far and few between. I appreciate the concern and the love from each and every one of you.
I answered a few of you, but if I didn’t I’m sorry- it’s honestly nothing personal against y’all. I’m just not feeling like myself lately.
I’m beginning to work closely with Lilith and hopefully she continues to be a huge help. Hopefully I’ll be out of this funk soon and be back to the normal perky blogger that you all love!
Thank you all for being patient and super understanding!
So I have a question and need to know if it’s a real thing or if I’m just being moody and crazy…
Does it really count as a “vacation” if you’re still doing almost everything you’d be doing if you were at home? Like does it even count if you’re still the main one taking care of the kids, making sure they don’t get hurt or hurt each other, cleaning up after them…y’all know- the usual “mom stuff” that I do any other day that we’re at home?
Maybe I’m just crazy, or getting ready for my menstrual and extra emotional, but it really doesn’t feel like a vacation to me anymore. The constant running around chasing kids, watching them play so they don’t get hurt or hurt someone else, making their bottles, making their plates for dinner….it’s literally the same stuff I do at home. I’m not on vacation, I’m just parenting in a different location.
Don’t get me wrong, I do love the change of scenery, and it’s always great to see family that lives far away. But I would love a vacation where we either don’t bring the kids (even if it’s just over night) or one where we bring the kids, but I actually don’t have to do all the responsibility of watching them. Even if it only happens once, and even if it’s just an overnight trip somewhere.
So this weekend we are spontaneously in Missouri. Yep! Andy’s sister called Friday night asking when could we get down here because she needs him to help build the deck on their new house. So, like the awesome guy he is, Andy told her we’d be down Saturday (last night).
We packed the bare essentials we’d need, loaded up the kids, and left Saturday morning. So while he’s out there building her a deck (with her husband and her helping as much as they can) I’m getting some time to relax and the boys are getting some time to visit and play with their cousins (which is always nice).
And honestly, as stressful as it was to make sure that we had everything we would need and everything for the kids, then leaving within 24 hours of finding out that we’d be going, I’m really enjoying the time away from the house. Not that our new house is stressful or anything, but it’s always nice to get a different view once in a while (especially being a stay at home mom).
I’ve already added some of the videos from the trip up here on our TikTok channel and I’ll be editing a video as soon as we get back so that should be up by the end of this week or the beginning of next week to our Youtube channel.
But this mini-spontaneous vacation was definitely needed. And I got to meet Chris’ (Andy’s sister’s husband) parents which was nice. They were super nice to me and were great with the kids. Chris’ dad actually gave AJ his first ride on a backhoe which he just thought was the most awesome thing in the universe!
What is y’alls favorite vacation (whether it was spontaneous or not) that you’ve ever taken?? Let us know in the comments below!
I know I haven’t really been keeping up with posting lately (even before we switched the blog’s hosting platform), and I’m sorry for that. I really hadn’t been feeling “myself” lately.
Not that I was sick or anything, I just felt disconnected from myself and I needed to take some time away to figure me out. And to just decompress. I’m still working on me (and that’s perfectly okay), but I think I’m finally becoming more accepting of the things I’m into and feeling less like I need to shelter myself away from the world.
I didn’t want to accept the fact that my religion of choice is a form of Paganism for so long. Not because I was ashamed of it. But because society usually looks at you different when you let it out that that’s the religious path you are on. I didn’t want to be considered weird, or judged for it.
But in the process of trying to “fit in” with what society approves us, I actually damaged my mental health. So I’m over it. I’m done sheltering who I am out of fear of what society will say or think. I’m over worrying about trying to fit in with everyone else.
I am a Norse pagan specifically an Asatru. I haven’t told many people yet, so far actually on Andy knows. Not that I’m ashamed of it, but more so avoiding the judgement from my family.
I was raised in a highly Catholic family, so going against that religion definitely will get some looks and will cause people to talk. But one day I’ll get to the point to where I’m fully comfortable and accepting of it myself. I’m definitely working on it.
To those of you who do accept it,thank you. I’ll be making posts here and there following my journey to accepting it if you’d like to follow, they’ll be in their own category named “Asatru Path”.
Thank you all for making me feel comfortable to finally be my true self and accept who I am. I love each and every one of you!
Most of you have noticed the changes with the blog (& quite a few of you sent us emails about it), between the link changing, the look/feel, and even some of our posts being gone.
I know I made a quick post about the issue previously, but I’ll talk about it one more time for those who missed it.
Basically the security certificate for our other website on a different hosting platform either expired, was accidentally deleted, or had a breech. We shut the site down for a little while to try and repair everything. But ultimately, there was issues beyond our knowledge.
After a lengthy back and forth conversation with the hosting company and a meeting with our tech support group, we felt the best decision was to just move back to our original hosting platform and resume posting on the blog that started it all.
So…HERE WE ARE!
Some of you all were messaging us asking about the breech leaking credit card numbers and other personal information. I understand your concerns, and I want to reassure you that no information to that extent was leaked. The only information that we ever asked for on our blog was an email address, if you wanted to subscribe to our email list.
I understand that so much information can be found with an email address, so if you experience any issues with your email, please do NOT hesitate to message us and we will help settle it with you.
We will continue sharing out stories here and everything has been fixed as of now (08.22.21). Thank you all for understanding and continuing to be followers. We absolutely love each and every one of you!
So we found the Karen and the Ken of the new neighborhood. The kin we just recently found and it’s actually a group of them.
We’ll start with the Karen. Before we moved in, we came out and we’re working on the property, it definitely needed some TLC to make it livable. Well one of those days we were looking for the water meter, to see where ours was on the property. (Our property is actually split into two different addresses so we were looking to see if everything ran on one water meter, or if there were two separate ones).
While we were walking the edge of the property near the road, one of Karen’s dogs got out of her fence and ran over to us. She came over almost immediately (she was outside so she saw him get out) to get him. Well when she saw us, she asked what we were doing, and when we told her that we were looking for the water meters and we’re buying the property her attitude went from somewhat friendly to a little irritated.
She told us that her son had been at the police auction to try and buy the land but he was outbid by just a little bit by the guy we’re buying it from. she tried telling us that she knew what the property was worth because she was at the auction, which she was wrong about because what it’s actually worth is more than what it sold for it auction and more than what we are paying for it. Well, when Andy corrected her about that, she seemed to get even more pissed off and tried to scare us away from the property by telling us that there’s nothing in our backwoods, which is 6 + acres of land, but buried trash and old junk trailers, which we already knew about. But the trash is buried pretty far under the ground for the most part, and the trailers we saw on satellite view of the area.
Well I was telling her that none of that is an issue because we plan to have the trailers moved and we’re going to clear up the property to build our dream house on (an underground dome), just pissed her off even more. Her biggest issue that she kept circling around and every attempt to convince us not to buy the property was that her son really wanted it, the trash buried on the back half, and that we were paying too much more than it’s worth. Her final attempt was trying to tell us that there are cats, some alive and some dead, all under the house (which there really wasn’t anywhere near as many as she tried telling us).
Once she noticed that we were happy about the property, she just went on the defensive and told us about her dogs. There’s only two that really get out, she owns six of them, one will just come over and sniff around and isn’t really known to bite. But the other one she said will bite us because he doesn’t like other people at all. Well, y’all know how protective we are about strange animals are on the kids, so Andy looks her straight in the eyes and told her flat out “if the kids or any of us are outside and her dogs get out and try running over to us, we will shoot them.” He suggested she either get a better fence or give them more of an area to run in. I’m sure y’all can guess she didn’t like that at all. That’s when she shut up and just turned around and went back inside her house.
We’ve had a couple issues with one of her dogs running in our yard and he came full force towards us while we were walking the property with AJ (after we’ve moved in), well a buddy of ours who’s living with us (will call him Brandon) jumped in between the dog and AJ just in time to kick the dog in the jaw and chase it back over to her yard. and none of her dogs have come running up to us since. They’ve been in our yard and pooping just on the edge of a property by the road but will be fixing that too soon. Funny though, we haven’t seen or heard anything else from Karen since that one meet up before we moved in.
And now…for Ken.
So Ken’s story really isn’t as long, just because we’ve never met him or them in person. But basically the property right beside ours, is where Ken and his family / friends / people live. We actually didn’t know anyone was living there until recently because there’s no actual house on the property, it’s just a shed and a couple of tents.
Well Ken and his people also have quite a few dogs, and their dogs aren’t as friendly or calm (from the ones we’ve met) as Karen’s. Andy’s actually chased them off quite a few times. Well we’ve never actually met ken, we have seen and heard him and whoever else lives over there with him coming and going quite often. Them leaving all the time like that, on top of living in sheds and tents made us quite suspicious of them, which we were right about since we recently learned from a mutual friend that they are big drug dealers / users and they don’t have any running water or electricity over there at all. We figured they didn’t have electricity though because we hear a generator startup every so often, like they’re charging their phones or something.
Now of course their dogs are big issues since we know they really aren’t friendly and they don’t keep them on leashes or in a fence (obviously since they’ve ran up in our yard more than once trying to attack us), but our biggest issue with them is that we noticed they moved the property line markers so they’re actually doing whatever drugs or illegal activity they’re making on our property. So I plan first is to have the land resurveyed and kick their tents and any other buildings that they have off of our damn land. We’ve looked up a few land survey companies and all of them say that because of how much land we have and the fact that most of it is woods, we’re looking to pay anywhere between $1,000 and $2,000, which yeah that’s a lot of money.
However, we did a little research and it is possible for us to survey our own property line, which is more in our budget and most likely the route we’re going to take. Pretty sure I’ll have another story for you guys from Ken after we get the property poll markers move back, so stay tuned for that.
But other than the Karen and Ken neighbors, everything is going super great! We only have one other person on our street and we met him and he’s pretty cool. No big complaints about him. He helps mow part of our property because he likes it keeps his yard looking nice and in a good flow, so that’s nice. He does have dogs but we’ve only heard his dogs and see them when we are leaving and drive past his house, he actually keeps his in pretty good kennels and on good leashes they’re pretty good about staying in his own yard so no issue with him there.
But I will definitely be back and update you guys once we start doing the property line markings about how Ken and his people react to that shit.
Being a mom is hard. It’s physically, mentally, and emotionally draining sometimes.
There are days where you can’t imagine doing anything, but being a mom. And then, there are days where you want to do anything, but being a mom.
Some days you feel like you have it all together. And then other days, you’re wondering how you and the kids are still alive and the house hasn’t burned down yet.
Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love my kids to death and would give my life to save theirs without a second thought. And you relating to this post, doesn’t mean you don’t love your kids just the same.
Relating to this post means your human. It means you love your kids, but you also understand that you have to love yourself too.
Right now, it’s 11pm and while I would love nothing more than to be spending my anniversary night cuddled in bed with Andy…..I’m sitting in the boys’ room while David lays down and tries to go back to sleep.
Sure, once David passes out I’ll go get in bed with Andy, but he will already be asleep since he has to get up in the morning for work.
And this isn’t anything new tonight, nope honestly this is how our nights usually go.
Does it irritate me? Absolutely, right down to my soul. But I also wouldn’t trade these moments with my kids for anything.
Why? Because I know one day they won’t be this little and they will go to sleep on their own without needing cuddles from mommy. And honestly, I think that will break my heart more than anything.
Sure, I’m tired and would love to get my sleep. But I also know that pretty soon I’ll get all the sleep I need and I’ll be begging the boys to come cuddle with me.
So you see, while motherhood is absolutely an amazing experience and gift. Just because you would rather not be mom some days,doesn’t make you a horrible person and it doesn’t mean you don’t love your kids.
It means your human. To be a great mom, sometimes you do need to take a shutdown day and have time for yourself to reset.
You can love motherhood and your kids, while still wanting to take a day off.